( Wei Wuxian cannot take that, not this close. All he can do is shift, pull his forehead away, and pull Jiang Cheng into his arms again, because he's both cold and hot right now, flushed and at the edge of tears, because it's too much, he's not worth this, but they both are. They both are. Shijie had always said so.

Easier to have faith in her, even now, than to believe himself in some things. He's never wanted to stop believing in Jiang Cheng, had defended him to Lan Zhan and Wen Ning, had made the excuses, and said he's not as harsh, he isn't, he's not just the sum of his worst parts.

And he's not. Neither of them are. But-- )

I never wanted to leave.

( He should have said more, but he clings, holds tight to his once upon a brother. He'd cut ties, wanting to spare him. Or more, opened up the possibility, dared Jiang Cheng to do it, challenged him to make that call.

They were both idiots. It makes him laugh, but in a choked up, half sobbing way, burying his head at Jiang Cheng's neck. )

Back then, I didn't know what else to say. I couldn't give up on them, I didn't feel like I could tell you to face off against the rest of anyone... I didn't want you to have to be stuck.

( Like he was. )