( Letting go is something he's generally good at, which is why he doesn't at all right now. Splattered oil won't even make him flinch, though thankfully for them both, what does hit heat and spring forth from pan confines mostly goes to the sides, or back, or is caught again by the pan. He watches the whole process with idle fascination from Lan Zhan's shoulder, breathing in the scents of cooking everything, vegetables and tofu and the sauce, watching the wok hay and in general being a not terribly useful addition to this process.
Though he does keep up an off and on chatter commentary of what's going on in the pan, along with; )
( ... wait, that makes him weird, doesn't it? He finally unbarnacles himself from Lan Zhan and collects the plates for dishing, setting them down to the side of the range. )
Right, right, breakfast smells amazing! Does anything not smell amazing when you make it?
[Yes, Wei Ying might look like he's moving and talking all the time, but Wangji actually knows he's capable of being quiet when Wangji is practicing his music. It's happened a few times before.]
It's a new recipe. Hopefully it tastes as good as it smells.
[Especially since, as usual, spice dosage has to be eyeballed because tasting is an absolute no.]
... I do. I said so, right? I can promise not to make faces the whole time.
( he won't make any, other than attentiveness. in the various ways he clowns around, during times where people truly need to work, he does not.
either way, the thoughts on food make him glance down and he presses a kiss to the back of Lan Zhan's neck, brushing aside stray locks of hair to do so. )
If it doesn't, I'll whine about it so you know.
( he's mostly teasing. he really only whines when comfortable with doing so, and if it's helpful in some sense: helpful to learn from, helpful to distract, helpful to redirect. )
Mah, want tea? Did you already make tea. Have I forgotten about tea?
( That's the moment where Wei Wuxian does as he said he should, and sighs as he unkoalas himself, pressing a parting kiss to Lan Zhan's shoulder as he turns and sets about making tea. His worst tea crimes are usually oversteeping after being distracted and losing track of time; he was focussed on the kitchen and Lan Zhan and the tea, and so it's less likely now than most days.
The kettle sets to boil to the right temperature, and he pulls open the drawer for the steeper, chatting as he does: )
What did you want this morning?
( Lan Zhan, are you sure you're putting this man back to bed after feeding him? )
[Yes, yes, he is sure. And you'll be crashing in no time once he has you back in there, he is sure as well.]
Jasmine, please.
[Wangji usually drinks a lot of straight black tea, but doesn't shy away from more floral blends on occasion. And once his limbs are free, it's easy enough to pile the food in bowls and bring them to the table along with chopsticks and some extra spicy sauce for seasoning for Wei Ying.]
Are you going to be living here now? Not with your brother anymore?
( He finds the jasmine, preparing their tea as Wangji sets to getting their serving sizes together. At the question, he pauses, looking to Lan Zhan. )
With Jiang Cheng? You do realise I got tired of listening to his whining shouting sexcapades months ago, right, that's why Fei Du was feeling helpfully inclined after he decided on going full time with Wenzhou.
[Wangji's eyes are going to widen a bit at that, because.... are they talking about the same Jiang Wanyin here?]
Since when does Jiang Wanyin have... 'sexcapades'?
[No seriously, what even? People usually think Wangji is the repressed one, and to be honest he doesn't really care or do anything to dispel the notion, but... really?]
[Wangji opens his mouth. Closes it. Stares at his tea cup with a slight frown.]
... Oh.
[He has actually know Huaisang the longest, out of all the people he knows here, and 'sexcapades' are definitely something he would believe of Huaisang for sure. The man has a reputation and he is not shy about it.
But to think he'd have chosen Jiang Wanyin, of all people... People who think Nie Huaisang is a wimp and a coward and someone who gives up easily truly don't know him all that well.]
( Oh, anyone who thinks Nie Huaisang is not a tiger in a kitten's skin are easily incapable of looking past any surface, and likely deserve everything they have coming. Wei Wuxian smiles, carrying his own mug of tea and one bowl arbitrarily selected, heading for the table. )
Come on, don't let it break your brain too much! That'd be if I shared any of what I'd been overhearing.
[There are certain things he is aware of, but without any desire to know more about them and this is most definitely one of them. Except, maybe on on point.]
Are they moving in together, then? Does Huaisang's brother know?
[Wangji doesn't remember his brother telling him about that, and if Xichen knew, he would have mentioned it, and there's only one way he would know, if Nie Mingjue had told him.]
How brave do you think the two of them are being? I figure he will once anything serious is brought up, though if Huaisang will realise it first or Jiang Cheng will bluster his way into proposing is anyone's guess.
[That serious, huh? Well, Wangji is certain he will either witness the fireworks first hand or hear about them from his brother anyway. It's not like the older nie brother will actually do anything bad to his little brother's suitor once he gets the surprise out of his system in the best way he knows - which will be loud, no doubt. Hopefully, he and Huaisang don't have too big of a fight about it, because Xichen always gets stuck in the middle of those.
Although now that he thinks about it...]
Wei Ying, would you move in with me if I asked you to?
( the tea cup slips out of his hands and hits the counter, bounces, and Wei Wuxian catches it in the spray of hot water and hot ceramic in a fumble as he dances back, yelping. )
Wangji quickly gets up and around the table so he can catch Wei Ying's wrist, and pull him towards the sink and put his hand under the cold water spray right away.]
( He protests verbally without offering any physical resistance when Lan Zhan pulls him over to the sink, running his hand under cold water. He honestly doesn't feel much of it, but telling that to Lan Zhan seems wrong, too, in a sense, like he's admitting something that's not normal. So he doesn't say that, just repeats: )
I'm fine, really, Lan Zhan, I am.
( But if this helps, and logically he knows for the sake of his skin, it does help, then he won't fight it. Just bite his lower lip, thinking and fussed over his own thoughts, and: )
Do you... do you want that?
( Living together, it feels like an even more intimate step, and he's scared, a bit, of there being a tipping point he'll find if they're living together and what happens, what happens if he suddenly feels too cooped up? What if Lan Zhan finds him too annoying? It's one thing to tolerate in friends, but he's seen how slow fractures can drive people from caring about each other to loving under heavy weights of frustration and unhappiness, and he doesn't live with Yanli to see how she and Zixuan handle themselves, to know it's okay. Zixuan refused to have anything to do with her most their lives, so even that! There's no precedence. None that he has. )
[Wangji takes a second before he nods. Yes, if he is very honest with himself, he would want that. He didn't really think about it before, but... in the past two years, how many nights has Wei Ying ended up in his apartment? Or Wangji at his? Even befre this new development between them, it happened frequently enough and Wangji has bene feeding him for close to a year.]
You don't have to decide right now. Just... think about it?
( He looks from the water flowing over his hand to Lan Zhan, studying his face. He feels shy, deflated, less confident, and then smiles, the sideways expression of his uncertainty. )
I... yeah. I mean, yes, I, it'd be easier for some things ( and he blushes, just a touch, because he doesn't mean sex until he thinks and concludes okay, sex may be part of it, but the food and the back and forth and the everything else? ) but I know I'm not easy to live with.
[Do you even know, Wei Ying? Probably not, because you have bene pretty dumb about this whole thing, but still even you should be able to go back a bit and realize how long Wangji has been around you, orbiting you.]
Are you planning t become a totally different person? I'm not saying it's easy, Wei Ying, being in a relationship. But it's not like you to give up without even trying.
I don't know, that's who I am now, who am I going to be five years from now?
( He's not thinking short term, and that may be part of the problem, because he wants, desperately, to think long term. Then balks, because his life has never supported long term investments to any fruitful ending. He slides his hand up from Lan Zhan's wrist to cup over the hand cupping his face. )
I don't know how to do this.
( And it means making himself vulnerable, like this morning, like in the shower, like now. Like so many things he's not good at, because letting someone in deeper means missing them harder if they're gone, and he's so used to people leaving. )
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Though he does keep up an off and on chatter commentary of what's going on in the pan, along with; )
What was it you had to get done today?
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[Which is why he was able to just pack up and come after learning Wei Ying hadn't had dinner.]
I do have practice in the afternoon and I booked a studio for it, so I'll have to go.
[And go back to his place to pick up his instrument, too, because he didn't cart this here on top of his bag and the food.]
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( ... wait, that makes him weird, doesn't it? He finally unbarnacles himself from Lan Zhan and collects the plates for dishing, setting them down to the side of the range. )
Right, right, breakfast smells amazing! Does anything not smell amazing when you make it?
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[Yes, Wei Ying might look like he's moving and talking all the time, but Wangji actually knows he's capable of being quiet when Wangji is practicing his music. It's happened a few times before.]
It's a new recipe. Hopefully it tastes as good as it smells.
[Especially since, as usual, spice dosage has to be eyeballed because tasting is an absolute no.]
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( he won't make any, other than attentiveness. in the various ways he clowns around, during times where people truly need to work, he does not.
either way, the thoughts on food make him glance down and he presses a kiss to the back of Lan Zhan's neck, brushing aside stray locks of hair to do so. )
If it doesn't, I'll whine about it so you know.
( he's mostly teasing. he really only whines when comfortable with doing so, and if it's helpful in some sense: helpful to learn from, helpful to distract, helpful to redirect. )
Mah, want tea? Did you already make tea. Have I forgotten about tea?
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[And maye making tea will make Wei Ying settle down a little. The kiss makes Wangji give a shiver, but he doesn't dislodge Wei Ying.
At least until...]
I need to put the food in the bowls, Wei Ying.
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( That's the moment where Wei Wuxian does as he said he should, and sighs as he unkoalas himself, pressing a parting kiss to Lan Zhan's shoulder as he turns and sets about making tea. His worst tea crimes are usually oversteeping after being distracted and losing track of time; he was focussed on the kitchen and Lan Zhan and the tea, and so it's less likely now than most days.
The kettle sets to boil to the right temperature, and he pulls open the drawer for the steeper, chatting as he does: )
What did you want this morning?
( Lan Zhan, are you sure you're putting this man back to bed after feeding him? )
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Jasmine, please.
[Wangji usually drinks a lot of straight black tea, but doesn't shy away from more floral blends on occasion. And once his limbs are free, it's easy enough to pile the food in bowls and bring them to the table along with chopsticks and some extra spicy sauce for seasoning for Wei Ying.]
Are you going to be living here now? Not with your brother anymore?
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With Jiang Cheng? You do realise I got tired of listening to his whining shouting sexcapades months ago, right, that's why Fei Du was feeling helpfully inclined after he decided on going full time with Wenzhou.
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Since when does Jiang Wanyin have... 'sexcapades'?
[No seriously, what even? People usually think Wangji is the repressed one, and to be honest he doesn't really care or do anything to dispel the notion, but... really?]
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Nie Huaisang.
( There is a source of inspiration behind everything. That was, bizarrely, the one here. )
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... Oh.
[He has actually know Huaisang the longest, out of all the people he knows here, and 'sexcapades' are definitely something he would believe of Huaisang for sure. The man has a reputation and he is not shy about it.
But to think he'd have chosen Jiang Wanyin, of all people... People who think Nie Huaisang is a wimp and a coward and someone who gives up easily truly don't know him all that well.]
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Come on, don't let it break your brain too much! That'd be if I shared any of what I'd been overhearing.
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[There are certain things he is aware of, but without any desire to know more about them and this is most definitely one of them. Except, maybe on on point.]
Are they moving in together, then? Does Huaisang's brother know?
[Wangji doesn't remember his brother telling him about that, and if Xichen knew, he would have mentioned it, and there's only one way he would know, if Nie Mingjue had told him.]
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( He shrugs, taking a sip of tea. )
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[That serious, huh? Well, Wangji is certain he will either witness the fireworks first hand or hear about them from his brother anyway. It's not like the older nie brother will actually do anything bad to his little brother's suitor once he gets the surprise out of his system in the best way he knows - which will be loud, no doubt. Hopefully, he and Huaisang don't have too big of a fight about it, because Xichen always gets stuck in the middle of those.
Although now that he thinks about it...]
Wei Ying, would you move in with me if I asked you to?
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I'm okay!
( he says automatically, followed by: )
The cup's okay!
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Wangji quickly gets up and around the table so he can catch Wei Ying's wrist, and pull him towards the sink and put his hand under the cold water spray right away.]
... Wei Ying, be careful.
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I'm fine, really, Lan Zhan, I am.
( But if this helps, and logically he knows for the sake of his skin, it does help, then he won't fight it. Just bite his lower lip, thinking and fussed over his own thoughts, and: )
Do you... do you want that?
( Living together, it feels like an even more intimate step, and he's scared, a bit, of there being a tipping point he'll find if they're living together and what happens, what happens if he suddenly feels too cooped up? What if Lan Zhan finds him too annoying? It's one thing to tolerate in friends, but he's seen how slow fractures can drive people from caring about each other to loving under heavy weights of frustration and unhappiness, and he doesn't live with Yanli to see how she and Zixuan handle themselves, to know it's okay. Zixuan refused to have anything to do with her most their lives, so even that! There's no precedence. None that he has. )
You, that wouldn't be too much?
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You don't have to decide right now. Just... think about it?
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I... yeah. I mean, yes, I, it'd be easier for some things ( and he blushes, just a touch, because he doesn't mean sex until he thinks and concludes okay, sex may be part of it, but the food and the back and forth and the everything else? ) but I know I'm not easy to live with.
( He's known this his whole life. )
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[Because let's face it, they're sleeping at each other's place more often than not, and Wangji keeps them fed.
He goes to cup Wei Ying's cheek.]
Why is it so hard for you to believe that I want to be with you?
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( He leans his cheek into the hand cupping his face, bringing his unharmed hand up, forming a loose ring around Lan Zhan's wrist. )
It's not as hard believing you care about me now. It's... it's hard believing you'll keep caring about me, later.
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[Do you even know, Wei Ying? Probably not, because you have bene pretty dumb about this whole thing, but still even you should be able to go back a bit and realize how long Wangji has been around you, orbiting you.]
Are you planning t become a totally different person? I'm not saying it's easy, Wei Ying, being in a relationship. But it's not like you to give up without even trying.
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( He's not thinking short term, and that may be part of the problem, because he wants, desperately, to think long term. Then balks, because his life has never supported long term investments to any fruitful ending. He slides his hand up from Lan Zhan's wrist to cup over the hand cupping his face. )
I don't know how to do this.
( And it means making himself vulnerable, like this morning, like in the shower, like now. Like so many things he's not good at, because letting someone in deeper means missing them harder if they're gone, and he's so used to people leaving. )
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